haven't been here in a while. it's funny how i only seem to yearn for or search for a "remedy" outlet when I'm hurting....as one can easily deduce by going back through previous entries..
today is okay as far as things go. many things have gotten so much better since I started writing here back in August.
And some things are about to be changing, and the spot light is really going to be on me this time to see if I've learned anything over the last few months and to see if I can apply what I've learned to start achieving the things I want...and maybe gaining back some things that I've lost....or
if I'm just going to fuck it all up. But that's not what I want...and I do NOT want to let that happen.
So today, as I said, I'm okay and things are okay. But today has also been really rough:
because I fucking miss him so much and I am being patient and working at it, but I feel like I was just reminded that I lost a major body part that it took forever to acclimate to the change. And now for some reason over the past week it's really increased in intensity...and it hurts. and I miss you. :(
