So in my last entry, I talked about having done some thinking/processing and that I had had some realizations about the causes of my current depression and shitty disposition toward life. Well, all that still holds true, but the story continues as the causes of my depression and my behavior are proving to be...well....not so great.
Lately, mainly over the past 2 or 3 days, I've been acting out in some of my sickest of character defects, and my outlook and attitude are being affected as well as I've grown more impatient, judgmental, negative, argumentative, self-righteous, And even worse, I'm taking it all out on people close to me that I care about.
Today, for example, what started off as an innocent conversation in an attempt to explain how I was feeling about things and why, turned into a hostile, volatile situation that had the other person downright scared to be around me and was so appalled at my behavior that they said that I'm not the person I was a week ago.
I am in need of a serious attitude readjustment and need to desperately inject some spiritual principles of the program into my life ASAP. Things like patience, ACCEPTANCE, integrity, forgiveness, open-mindedness, tolerance, willingness, and commitment.
I also need to ask the person mentioned earlier for forgiveness and apologize for how I treated her today.
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