Wtf...what time is it?

Did I seriously wake up at 7:20 of my own accord on a Sunday after getting a full night's sleep?  What the hell is going on around here.  You'd think I was acting like a grown up and being responsible or something.  Now I get to go to my home group meeting though, Sunday Morning Meeting, at 9:30!  And of course, the one day that I finally decide to return to that meeting and will be in attendance, I get a text from my sponsor saying he won't be there.  Lame.
Other than that, things have been really quiet over the last week.  I'm under orders/guidance from my sponsor to "be by myself for 90 days."  In other words, no "stray kittens," no random tricks, no random visitors in my apartment, no sketchy company, no drama, no sketchy/questionable friends, none of it.  Just me being by myself, because he said Michael needs to get okay with just being with Michael and not having to rely on having anybody else around to validate my existence.  I know he's right, but it's fucking lonely for a codependent like me who is used to gauging if he's okay based on making sure everybody else is okay.  Now that I don't have anybody else to focus on, all the attention, focus, and spotlights are on me and my feelings and my actions and behaviors and it's uncomfortable because I have to accept full responsibility for whatever happens throughout the course of my days now.  On the plus side, since implementing this "no stray kittens" directive, the past week has been quiet, calm, and peaceful, which is different from what I'm used to which is drama, chaos, or always something going on that I'm in the middle of or inserting myself in the middle of.  So sitting with myself and trying to get comfortable just being by myself is definitely proving to be a challenge, but so far it seems to be worth it because that loneliness I originally felt is subsiding and I'm starting to value my solitude and alone time to be able to do what I want or need to do to take care of myself.

Speaking of taking care of myself, time to get in the shower and head out for the meeting.

Stay tuned faithful followers.....