So I didn't get much sleep last night related to the current drama I have going on with my ratchet ass neighbors, but despite being exhausted, I still woke up on time (sort of) and made it to my homegroup meeting at 9:30. So far for 3 days into the new year I'm doing pretty good at making sure I get to at least one meeting every day, two if I can. I have to keep going every day and keep going and keep going because when I don't, I eventually start listening to the crazy bullshit my head tells me and my thinking starts to become distorted and self-destructive. By showing up for just one hour a day, I get some relief and hope of not having to be a complete fuck up basketcase my whole life and also get the chance to get and stay connected with others in recovery that I can talk to who just get what this struggle can be like, the ups, downs, lows, highs (no pun intended), and other more intricate concepts like the gift of desperation, moments of clarity, self-care, the definition of insanity, and taking things one thing, minute, second, hour, day at a time.
So for today, I got my medicine and will hopefully be a little less crazy for the remainder of the day. One can only hope though lol. =]
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