Saturday, November 14, 2015

A New Special Somebody? And Thanksgiving Plans

So, totally random, and I know I'm probably going to get a ton of shit for this (from my sponsor, my mom, and all my friends in recovery, the list goes on and on), and yes, I know:  "no relationships for the first year" and all that.  But, being an addict and a junkie, when are we known to follow the goddamn rules?  Yeah, never.  So here I am...and I think I've landed myself in a situation where, as of today, I think I'm dating someone.  I'm still replaying the events of the last 24 hours in my head (all good, no drama or anything like that) and it all seems surreal and too good to be true.
After the nearly fatal toxicity of my relationship with Drew and the gut wrenching soul crushing break up afterwards, it absolutely broke me, shattered me inside, and left me damaged.  After that,I've basically been living true to my vow to absolutely NO RELATIONSHIPS OR DATING UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.  I was closed for business in that department until I was able to sort through all the emotions that the Drew situation still conjures in me to this day.  But I met somebody that, quite literally overnight, turned out to be pretty incredible, and we talked today and agreed to give it a try.  I chose my words very carefully as I talked this out with him because I didn't want to make any promises that I won't be able to keep, and I gave a full disclosure of what he was getting himself into:  a fucked up codependent mess with tons of baggage and trust issues, and that still didn't scare him away.  So we shall see where this goes.  I'm hopeful, but cautiously optimistic.
Otherwise, Thanksgiving is quickly approaching and mom and I talked about it and we thought of something completely different to do this year than cooking enough food to feed an army then entering a food-induced comatose vegetative state after gorging ourselves on said food.  Instead of the feast, I think we're going to volunteer at the Las Vegas Rescue Mission and give some of our time to those less fortunate, especially on a day like Thanksgiving where my mom and I have each other, I have my friends and tons of blessings in my life, and I would have a whole table over flowing with food, while these people have absolutely nothing but the clothes on their backs and are probably fucking starving for a decent meal and shelter for the night.  Nothing screams "humbling" more than that in my head for a Thanksgiving experience.  
More soon.  Stay tuned faithful followers.

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